Of course. You're special, and have no need of the rules, unlike the those other plebs. It's so very obvious to everyone, I'm shocked the lifeguards don't recognise that.
You know that most places in yurope simply don’t have them right. My first time in the usa we were bewildered that some little lake had life guards and wanted us to do swim tests. To fuck with them we all did something silly: I swam the swim test under water, my sister did it in butter fly, etc. One lifeguard looked annoyed but his colleague waved to him to just let the weirdo european be
I recall being in Germany and asking the lifeguard at the pool if me and my four friends could go down the waterslide together as one writhing mass, and he looked at me like I was crazy. "Of course you can, why wouldn't you be able to?"
You’re a grown man who spits on a lifeguard’s constraints on your behavior? Hoping so much that this is satire. You’re welcome to deal with all the bleeding and fainting and biting and pooping and vomiting at the pool since you’re such a better person than any lifeguard you have ever seen.
They're also totally useless. Last year, I pulled a stiff, staring, non-responsive kid out of the water in view of three of them, one of which was less than ten feet away on a lookout chair directly above him. He was doing the ladder climbing thing right in front of them and they didn't notice. They didn't notice when I kept asking him if he was OK and he didn't respond. And they didn't notice when I hoisted him out of the water. When his mom came over to thank me, I asked one of the girls if she had seen what had happened or if she was too busy talking to her friends. She didn't say anything. And how is some 100 lb 16 year old girl going to restrain a panicked and much stronger drowning man who is twice her weight and pull him to safety anyway?
When I’m out for a long hike and some rando wants to warn me about the local fauna, or when I’m posting about mushrooms and my tone-deaf friend (who is a defense lawyer, not a mushroom expert) feels the need to tell me that I should always be absolutely sure.
Of course. You're special, and have no need of the rules, unlike the those other plebs. It's so very obvious to everyone, I'm shocked the lifeguards don't recognise that.
Me too tbh
You know that most places in yurope simply don’t have them right. My first time in the usa we were bewildered that some little lake had life guards and wanted us to do swim tests. To fuck with them we all did something silly: I swam the swim test under water, my sister did it in butter fly, etc. One lifeguard looked annoyed but his colleague waved to him to just let the weirdo european be
I recall being in Germany and asking the lifeguard at the pool if me and my four friends could go down the waterslide together as one writhing mass, and he looked at me like I was crazy. "Of course you can, why wouldn't you be able to?"
I once had to rescue my son who slipped into the deep end while the lifeguard was literally 5 yards away.
You’re a grown man who spits on a lifeguard’s constraints on your behavior? Hoping so much that this is satire. You’re welcome to deal with all the bleeding and fainting and biting and pooping and vomiting at the pool since you’re such a better person than any lifeguard you have ever seen.
Thanks for the comment Karen
As a child, a lifeguard once ordered me not to hang on to the side of the wave pool... *as I was drowning in it*. I'll never forget that moment.
They're also totally useless. Last year, I pulled a stiff, staring, non-responsive kid out of the water in view of three of them, one of which was less than ten feet away on a lookout chair directly above him. He was doing the ladder climbing thing right in front of them and they didn't notice. They didn't notice when I kept asking him if he was OK and he didn't respond. And they didn't notice when I hoisted him out of the water. When his mom came over to thank me, I asked one of the girls if she had seen what had happened or if she was too busy talking to her friends. She didn't say anything. And how is some 100 lb 16 year old girl going to restrain a panicked and much stronger drowning man who is twice her weight and pull him to safety anyway?
The younger generation seems to be basically incapable of taking any job seriously to be fair. Probably not a lifeguard thing specifically.
True.
When I’m out for a long hike and some rando wants to warn me about the local fauna, or when I’m posting about mushrooms and my tone-deaf friend (who is a defense lawyer, not a mushroom expert) feels the need to tell me that I should always be absolutely sure.
Same vibe. :)
I'm something of a mushroom understander myself
It’s because we live in a very litigious society. Lawyers love making $$$$ when people don’t follow their stupid rules.
Pool anarchism…